King Bob's Day Out
by Dixie Darlin
Summary: my first ff! King Bob tires of his royal duties and decides to skip school. He is tagged along by Ashley A., is hunted down by Miss Finster, and while he's gone the Kindergartners have declared war on the playground! RR!
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: I do not own the show Recess or anything related to it.  
  
Author's Note: This is my first fanfiction so be gentle!  
  
This is basically a King Bob/Ashley A. sort of thing. They're my favorite characters but I also like Spinelli, Francis the Hustler Kid, Randall, and sometimes T.J. I hope you enjoy this!  
  
Prologue  
  
It was the first recess of the day. T.J. and his friends were waiting in line to play tetherball, as was almost every other kid on the playground.  
  
"Man, I have a feeling today is going to be a great day!" T.J. exclaimed.  
"Why do you say that?" Gus asked.  
"Because that worm Randall isn't here to squeal on us to Miss Finster, that's why," Spinelli answered in her know-it-all voice. "Which means we can practically get away with doing whatever we want! Miss Finster's nothing without him."  
"Hey, where is the little snitch anyway?" asked Vince looking around the playground. "He's hardly ever absent."  
"He had a dentist appointment to go to. Maybe it'll take all day," hoped Spinelli. * * * * * * * * * * * * *  
"I am, like, so bored," Ashley A. said with a sigh.  
"Definitely. Hey, let's talk about like that new brand of makeup. You know, Sweet Perfection," said Ashley B.  
"No, let's talk about that new all-boys singing group, Heartthrob," said Ashley Q.  
"I really don't feel like doing anything today, Ashley's," Ashley A. admitted. She had been down in the dumps lately but none of the other Ashley's knew what was wrong.  
"I'm just going to take a walk around, or something," she said, and left the Ashley clubhouse. The other girls shrugged and started doing their usual gossip. * * * * * * * * * * * * *  
King Bob was upon his throne on top of the jungle gym, as usual. Today he was bored out of his mind. There simply wasn't anything to do. He glanced around the playground. The line to play tetherball didn't need organizing, Spinelli was actually keeping her cool today, Randall wasn't around to bother anyone, and even the Ashley's weren't doing anything. scandalous, as they would say. King Bob slumped in his seat.  
"Is there a problem, Your Majesty?" asked one of his henchmen.  
"Well, yeah. I'm BORED," replied the King of the Playground.  
"May I suggest a game of chess to keep you occupied, my liege?"  
"Absolutely not! You know I despise that game," glared King Bob.  
"Begging your pardon, sir, but maybe if you would learn how to play."  
"Are you questioning my intelligence? Are you? Are you?" King Bob rose from his throne and stared the boy down.  
"No, of course not, sir!" the henchman trembled at the sight of the angry king. "I was only suggesting that if you knew the right moves, you would win, and maybe even start liking the game."  
King Bob dropped back into his seat in the same slumped position he had been in all day. He dismissed his servants and was left alone. He really wished he could have a normal life, like all the other kids at school. Sometimes being king wasn't much fun. * * * * * * * * * * * * Hoped you liked the first chapter! I'll have more action in the next one. Please Review! 


	2. Escaping the Playground

Disclaimer: I don't own Recess.  
  
Author's Note: Sorry if the first chapter was boring but I had to give some background for the rest of it.  
  
Chapter One: Escaping the Playground  
  
While King Bob sat in his throne he began to get an idea. What if he could find a way to skip school? Then he wouldn't have to be bored for the rest of the day and still come back in time for the end of school.  
King Bob decided to risk the chance of Miss Finster catching him and descended from the junglegym. His guards came rushing to him.  
"Your Majesty, what are you doing?" asked one. "You know your not supposed to tire yourself by walking around. Why didn't you just call us?"  
"I'm not feeling too well. I needed the fresh air," Bob lied. He hoped they would fall for it. "I might check out of school later if I feel worse."  
"Do you want us to come with you, sir?" asked his other guard.  
"No!" Bob said quickly. "Uh, no. I want to be alone thanks. Just stay here and do your job okay? And there's no need to trouble the other kids about this. Okay?"  
"Yes, sir!" Bob breathed a huge sigh of relief when they finally left.  
"Now to get out of here!" he said to himself. He went around the back of the playground behind the trees and bushes. Looking around to see if anyone was watching, he took off the crown and robe. Like he was going to run around town wearing them. The shoes that made him a head taller than what he really was had to go too (he wore tennis shoes underneath them for extra comfort). He was about to jump the fence when he heard something.  
"Who's there?" he demanded. He hoped he was only hearing things. There was no telling what would happen if a kid saw him breaking school rules.  
He was a bit surprised to see Ashley A. come out. The Ashley's usually just stayed in the old tire heap they called their clubhouse.  
"Oh, like, hello King Bob," she said. "What are you doing out here?"  
"I should be asking you the same question," Bob said suspiciously.  
"But I asked you first," Ashley argued. She didn't like being bossed around.  
"Yeah, but I'm the king," Bob said with a smart-alecky grin.  
Ashley gave up. She couldn't argue with that.  
"Okay, fine. I came out here because I'm, like, tired of the other Ashley's crowding me. I needed, like, you know, room to breathe. But you wouldn't know anything about that," she accused.  
"Hey, you think I enjoy having everyone smothering me with compliments, gifts, pampering, and undivided attention?" Bob demanded of her.  
"Well, yeah," Ashley answered. "Who wouldn't?"  
"Never mind." Bob continued to try climbing the fence.  
"Like, what are you doing?" Ashley asked.  
"What does it look like I'm doing?" Bob sneered. He wished she would just leave.  
"If I didn't know better, I'd say that you were trying to leave school."  
Bob jumped down off the side of the chain-linked fence.  
"Well, maybe that IS what I'm trying to do. But if you don't shut up, I'm not going to be able to," Bob pointed out. "All I want is a little day off from being king. Do you have a problem with that?"  
Ashley blinked in disbelief. The king was skipping school? How ironic! Usually just the troublemakers skipped school.  
"But you're, like, the king! You can't skip school! What if something bad happens?" Ashley asked concertedly.  
  
"Trust me. Nothing has happened all day. I don't think anything drastic will happen while I'm gone," Bob chuckled.  
He started climbing the fence again. Ashley still couldn't understand why he would want to skip.  
"Let me come with you," she asked quickly. Bob was so shocked by the question that he fell on the ground. He quickly picked himself up and dusted off.  
"What! No way!" he ordered. "There is no way that you're coming with me."  
"Please? I won't be any trouble. I promise." She crossed her heart with her finger. Bob thought about it. If he left her here she might tell someone and Miss Finster would find out. Maybe he should bring her.  
"Well, all right, you can tag along if you want," he said at last.  
"Oh thank you, thank you, King Bob! Don't worry. I won't tell a soul."  
"I hope not. Come on. Recess is almost over and I've wasted enough time with this ridiculous conversation." He at length scaled the fence and landed on the other side. The sidewalk under his feet felt great. He could feel freedom in the air around him.  
"Ahem," a voice behind him said. He turned to see Ashley A. with her arms crossed and tapping her foot in an agitated manner.  
"Well, what are you waiting for?" Bob asked. "Are you coming are not?"  
"Oh, please. Like I can actually climb this fence. It's so un- ladylike," she said matter-of-factly.  
Bob slapped his forehead with his palm in frustration. Did he have to everything?  
He climbed up to the top of the fence and hung halfway over it. He extended his arms down and said,  
"Here, grab on and I'll pull you over," he instructed. "Hurry up before someone sees us."  
Ashley grasped his hands and Bob hoisted her up and over the fence. Unfortunately, Bob lost his footing and both of them came crashing down on the hard concrete.  
"Oh my head," Bob moaned as he sat up. "Uh, Ashley, do you mean getting off of me?" She had landed on top of him and she was a lot heavier than she looked.  
"Oh, like, sure King Bob," she obeyed.  
"Just one more thing," Bob said. Ashley looked at him. "Don't call me 'King Bob' while we're out here. It's just plain old 'Bob' outside of school."  
  
I hope you guys like this chapter a little better. I know it's slow, but I like having them talk to each other. Don't worry something WILL happen next time. 


	3. The Kindergartners Attack!

Disclaimer: Recess does NOT and never will be mine.  
  
Chapter 2: The Kindergartners Attack!  
  
While King Bob and Ashley A. were making their escape, the Kindergartners began to come up with ideas of their own. Captain Sticky (the one who wears the paper crown) called a short meeting.  
"King of Big Kid Land has left! Now is time for attack on big kids! Kindergartners take over the school at once!" he shouted.  
"YAAAAYYYY!!!"  
"But first we must take care of teachers," Captain Sticky continued. "They all in teacher's lounge except the old one with scary face." (He was referring to Miss Finster there) "Tubby, Spencer, and Hector must go into building and lock teachers in lounge so they not come out." Tubby, Spencer and Hector saluted to Captain Sticky and went on their way.  
"Now, how to get rid of the old, scary one."  
  
"Like, Bob, are you sure about this?" Ashley A. asked a little nervously. They were in the teacher's parking lot and Bob was trying to hot-wire Principal Prickley's new red Mustang convertible.  
"Of course, I'm sure. We'll just borrow it for a couple of hours and bring it back before Principal Prickley leaves to go home. He won't even know it's gone."  
"But you're, like, only eleven years old! You can't drive!" Ashley protested.  
"On the contrary," Bob said slyly pulling out a card from his pocket. "Hustler Kid was nice enough to give me a fake driver's license a few weeks ago." "That is SO wrong."  
Finally, Bob got the car started. The purr of the engines gave him a feeling of power.  
"Okay, here we go," he said putting the car in drive and flooring the gas. This is what happens when sixth-graders try to drive: The car instantly went zooming into the fence, throwing an unbuckled Ashley A. into the dashboard. When Bob put it into reverse, the car almost hit Miss Finster's pink vehicle. Finally, after several attempted and deadly tries, the car made it out of the parking lot with a few scratches and got onto the road, knocking down several mailboxes and trash cans out of people's yards. Alas, the reason you can't drive unsupervised until you're at least 16, not 11.  
  
Tubby, Spencer, and Hector were busy in the hallway trying to lock the teachers in the lounge. They had swiped A.V. Kid's ring of keys after ambushing him and tying him up in a chair and were now standing on each other's shoulders trying to figure out which key locked the door. "Hurry up, Spencer!" Tubby panted, who happened to be on the bottom of the pile. "You guys getting too heavy!"  
  
"I hurrying, Tubby!" Spencer argued. At last he stuck the right key in and locked the door. "Oh boy, I did it!" he shouted, causing them all to avalanche down into a huge heap. "Now, Hector tell others while me and Tubby guard door. Run Hector! Run!" While Hector ran to tell Captain Sticky that they had completed their mission, Principal Prickley's voice could be heard from the inside. "What? What the-Hey, what's going on? Who locked this door? Hey, is anyone out there? Hello? Okay, who's idea was it to have the door lock from the outside?"  
  
Miss Finster was busy scouting the playground for troublemakers when she heard the crash. She turned quickly just in time to see Principal Prickley's new car drive into the fence before taking off in a speedy escape down the highway. "What in the world? Someone must be trying to skip school in Principal Prickley's car! This is just like it was back in '87! Hey, come back here, you hooligans!" she screamed and took off down the hallway to her own car. "No one skips school while Finster's around!" she muttered as she rushed onto the highway after the perpetrators.  
  
Bob was having the time of his life driving the principal's convertible, even if he was a safety hazard on the street. "Woo-hoo!! This is goin' to be this best day ever!" he cheered. "Not if you don't stop taking your eyes of the road!" Ashley snapped. Sure, she was as excited about skipping school as Bob was, but she was scared to death of his lack of driving skills. "Aw, come on! I'm not so bad." He glanced in the rear-view mirror and was horrified to see Finster coming after him in her car. "Oh my gosh! Finster's right behind me!" he yelled, picking up speed every second. "What? How did she find out we were skipping?" Ashley asked. "She must have seen me drive the car into the fence or something. We're going to have to make a few detours and make a run for it." Ashley brightened up. "How about the mall?" "What about it?" "Duh! We could, like, park the car there and then lose her in the mall. Besides, I need to go shopping anyway." Bob could have cared less for shopping, but he did like the idea of losing Miss Finster in the mall. "Ashley Armbrewster, you are a genius."  
  
Captain Sticky watched Miss Finster take off after King Bob and Ashley A. This was going to be a lot easier than he thought. "All right, kindergartners! Old, scary lady gone so now we take over playground!" he announced. "But how we do that?" asked Cindy. "Big kids so much bigger than us." "True, they are bigger than us, but we outnumber them," Captain Sticky explained.  
The kindergartners looked at each other. They may not have known how to count but they knew very well that they did not outnumber the "big kids".  
"You see, we not alone. Kindergartners from different places come help us. Other kindergartners, show yourselves!" At the order, about one hundred and twenty different kindergartners emerged from the building (they had tied up the kindergarten teacher) and joined the others.  
"NOW, we outnumber them."  
  
"Come on, Lawson! We've been through this a million times. Let us play tether-ball!" Spinelli argued.  
"Ooh, poor little fourth-grader wants to play with the ball?" Lawson taunted. "Well, guess what? You're not going to! Ha ha! What are you going to do know, Spinelli? Cry like a baby? Boo-hoo?"  
"That's it!" Spinelli shouted and tried jumping Lawson, except Mikey held her back. "I'm goin' to bash your nose in so hard that you're not even-"  
"Hey, guys!" T.J. called. "Guys! Stop, listen! Do you hear chanting?"  
Everybody on the playground stopped what they were doing. The chanting got louder and louder.  
"Sounds like the kindergartners are having some sort of party," Gus said.  
"Actually, I believe it is more of a war cry, Gus," Gretchen observed.  
"War cry? You mean they want to attack us?" Vince asked.  
"That's ridiculous. There's no way they can attack us. We outnumber them fifteen to one," T.J. reminded.  
The wooden gate to the kindergarten playground fell down and about one hundred and fifty wild kindergartners came stampeding toward the kids.  
"You were saying?" Mikey whispered to T.J.  
"Hey, they're only little kids. I say we take 'em!" Spinelli suggested angrily.  
"Good idea, Spinelli." T.J. congratulated. "Okay, everyone! For the playground!"  
"For the playground!" the other kids yelled and charged at the kindergartners. The war for the Third Street Elementary playground had begun. 


	4. Of Hustler Kids, Finsters, and Big Siste...

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Recess locations or characters except King Bob's mother. And I just made up King Bob's middle and last name because I have no idea what they are.  
  
Chapter Three: Of Hustler Kids, Finsters, and Big Sisters  
  
"Man, this whomps," T.J. muttered. "I can't believe we let a bunch of little kids take us prisoner on our own playground."  
All the kids were inside the big dome-shaped climbing thing that was used as a prison while Gus was the substitute king once. It was severely cramped in there.  
"Hey, it's not our fault we were unprepared," said Vince. "I mean, isn't King Bob supposed to tell us when something like this is going to happen?"  
"Speaking of King Bob, where is he?" Gretchen asked.  
Everyone looked around but didn't see King Bob anywhere. Finally, one of the guards spoke up.  
"He...he said he wasn't feeling too well and took a walk," he sniffled. "I...I didn't see him come back! I think the Kindergartners ate him!" The guard broke down into tears while someone held him.  
"Ate King Bob? Oh, the horror! The horror!" Mikey wailed.  
Everyone started getting very upset and scared. T.J. gave a sharp whistle.  
"Listen, I don't believe anyone got eaten," he said. "Why on earth would the Kindergartners want to eat him anyway?"  
"Well, actually," Gretchen started. "It all makes perfect sense."  
"What do mean, Gretch?" Vince asked.  
"What I mean is that if the Kindergartners got King Bob out of the way, then it would be easier for them to take over the playground. Therefore, we are rendered weak and helpless."  
"But just because King Bob is the king doesn't make him the strongest kid on the playground," Gus noted.  
"Tell me about it," T.J. agreed. "Spinelli's probably the strongest of all of us."  
"Oh, no!" Mikey yelled. "Spinelli's gone, too! Why? Why did they have to take Spinelli?"  
"Calm down, big guy," Vince pleaded. "It's already stressful enough in here without you making a big scene."  
"Hey!" Ashley Q. exclaimed. "Like, where's Ashley A.?"  
"Great sweet me! What is happening to the world?" Mikey cried.  
"Hey, everyone, look!" Gus yelled, pointing out towards the rest of the playground.  
Everyone gave a huge gasp. There was Captain Sticky standing there, only now he was wearing all of King Bob's "royal" apparel: the crown was much too large for his small head, the boots and robe only aided in causing him to trip every ten seconds, and the little guy was having a terrible time keeping a hold on the giant hockey stick sceptor.  
"You were right, Gretch." T.J. sighed. "I guess they WERE all eaten."  
  
Hiding in the bushes and observing everyone in the "prison", Spinelli felt like a big traitor. She couldn't help it if she freaked out and ran. But now, all her friends was being held captive by the Kindergartners.  
"I guess it's up to me to save them, as usual," she mumbled. "But who am I kidding? I may be the toughest kid this school's ever seen, but I can't take on all those little monsters alone!"  
Almost as soon as she said it, she heard something in the bushes. Spinelli jumped up and held out her fists.  
"Bring it on," she thought. If she was gonna go, she was gonna go down fighting.  
She was almost on the verge of having a heart attack when suddenly Francis the Hustler Kid came out.  
"WHOA!" Spinelli yelled. "Hustler Kid, you nearly scared me to death! What are you doing sneaking around out here antway?"  
"Who, me?" Hustler Kid asked, still shocked to see that he wasn't the only person that hadn't been taken prisoner. "I guess I'm doing what you're doing. You know, hiding."  
"I am NOT hiding!!" Spinelli argued angrily. "I'm just waiting for the right moment to attack. Yeah, that's it. I'm staying undercover until those little punks become weak enough for me to take them on."  
"Uh-huh," Hustler Kid said suspiciously. "And you're going to do that alone?"  
"Well, uh...yeah! Why not? You gotta better idea, Hustler-boy?"  
Hustler Kid rolled his eyes. Did she have to make a challenge out of everything?  
"No, but I would suggest that you have a plan of action before going out there. You just can't go barging out there like you own the place, you know," he advised.  
Spinelli thought about it. He was right, whether she liked it or not.  
"Well, I've never needed a plan before. I don't know how to do that sort of stuff. I just act!" she argued.  
"Exactly! What you need is the right equipment. And today just happens to be my Secret Agent Spy Stuff Day."  
He opened up his trench coat revealing all kinds of neat gadgets that would make even Kim Possible envious. Spinelli just stared.  
"Hey, this stuff's great!" she exclaimed. "Let me see that!" She reached to grab something but Hustler Kid quicky closed his jacket.  
"Whoa, whoa! Hands of the merchandise, Spin. I don't just give this stuff away, you know. If you want any of this, you've gotta pay."  
"Pay?!" Spinelli moaned. "I don't have anything to pay with!"  
"You're problem, not mine."  
"Aw, come on, Hustler Kid!" Spinelli pleaded. "I have to bust those kids out that horrible cage. How am I supposed to do that without all this cool stuff you have?"  
"You probably can't," Hustler Kid said.  
"Then why won't you help me? Listen, just let me borrow it for today then I'll give it back."  
"What! Are you crazy? That would degrade their value! I wouldn't be able to sell them, ever!"  
"Hustler Kid, you are trying my patience," Spinelli growled. "Let me use your stuff and I'll...I'll...I'll pay you whenever I can, okay?"  
"Well...I don't know. Okay, but I want the money by next Thursday, got it?"  
"Got it. Thanks, Francis."  
Hustler Kid blushed. He usually hated it when people called him by real name but he kind of like it when Spinelli said it.  
"No problem," he said a little shyly.  
"So, how much does this all add up to?"  
"Seventy five dollars."  
"SEVENTY FIVE DOLLARS!!! Oh, man..."  
  
Miss Finster was still hot on Bob and Ashley's trail. There was no way she was going to let them get away! No matter how many sharp turns, detours, and red lights they ran through, Miss Finster still managed to find them.  
"Man, did she memorize a map of the city or something?" Bob asked.  
"I don't know, but the mall's coming up in a few minutes," Ashley pointed.  
They swerved into the parking area of Townsedge Mall and squealed to a stop. A very crooked stop. They jumped out of the Mustang and ran for the entrance. Miss Finster was just pulling into the parking lot.  
"Okay, we'll have to split up and lose her," Bob told Ashley once they were in the building.  
"Are you, like, nuts? This place is really crowded! We'll never find each other!"  
"Um, let's meet back here in about thirty minutes," Bob said glancing at the big clock above the entrance door.  
"Okay."  
"Come here you little hooligans!" Miss Finster yelled while barging into the mall.  
"Go!" Bob shouted going to the left side, while Ashley stayed to the right.  
"I'm going to get you two if it's the last thing I do!" Miss Finster swore, before being surrounded by about twenty different Girl Scouts asking her if she wanted to buy cookies.  
When he was far enough away, Bob slowed down and ducked down behind a huge palm tree beside this ladies' clothing store.  
"Phew!" he breathed. "At least I lost her."  
"Robert?" he heard a voice say behind him.  
"AAAHHHH!!" he screamed and turned around to face...  
"Oh, uh...hi, Mom," he gulped.  
"Robert Anthony Mitchells, what on earth are you doing out of school?" his mother asked demandingly.  
"Uh, well, you see, Mom, I was just...I mean-"  
"You better not be cutting class, young man, because if you are-"  
"Oh, I'm not, Mom," Bob interrupted. "They let school out early today, because, because...the Kindergartners all got chicken pox and spread to half the other kids, so they let us all go home early." Boy, he hated lying to his mother.  
"Well, if you say so," Mrs. Mitchells said. "Don't have too much fun running around in here, okay?"  
"Um, okay."  
"All right. I'll be at home if you need anything. Bye, sweetie," she told him, while planting a kiss on his cheek.  
"Bye, Mom," he muttered while trying to wipe her kiss off.  
When she was out of sight, he gave a sigh of relief.  
"Man, that was close."  
"What was close?" he heard behind him.  
Bob turned around frightenedly. Oh, great! It was his older sister, Sheila.  
"Oh, hi, Sheila."  
"Don't 'hi' me, little brother. What did you mean when you said 'that was close', huh?" she snapped.  
"I didn't mean anything by it. I just said it, okay?" Bob was getting worried. His sister wasn't so easily fooled like his mother was.  
"I don't buy that, Bobby. Tell me. Are you skipping school?" Sheila asked nastily.  
"Didn't you hear me tell Mom why I wasn't in school?"  
"Yeah, I heard. That had to be the dumbest excuse ever! You are skipping school, aren't you?"  
"Uh, well, actually..." Bob stuttered.  
"Aha! I knew it," Sheila proclaimed. "You ARE skipping school and you lied to Mom too. I wonder if I should tell..."  
"No!" Bob shouted. "You can't tell Mom I lied to her! She'll ground me for a month!"  
"Well, that's the way the cookie crumbles, Bobby," Sheila told him while examining her fingernails. "Now, if you'll excuse me, Dorkbert, I have to ruin your life."  
"Come on, sis! You wouldn't really rat on me would you?"  
"Let me think about that. Yes, I would!" she barked. "Unless..."  
"Unless what?" Bob asked slowly.  
"Unless you did something for me in return."  
Bob's eyes widened.  
"Oh, no you don't!" he said, turning away. "There's no way you're making me try on any more girly dresses and floppy hats like last time!"  
"Why?" Sheila snorted. "What happened last time?"  
"To make a long story short, someone found out about it, blackmailed me, and everyone on the whole playground found out anyway!"  
"Geez, you don't have to get so touchy, little brother."  
"Oh, yeah? Well, chew on this. You tell Mom I lied to her, and I tell her what really happened to her car last weekend."  
"What? How did you find out I wrecked Mom's car?" Sheila squeaked.  
"That's for only me to know. But, still, your saying that the car was stolen from the college parking lot is a classic."  
"All right, fine!" Sheila yelled. "I won't tell Mom you're skipping school."  
"Thanks, sis."  
"You're welcome," she growled. "I've gotta go catch up with Mom. See you at home."  
"See ya," Bob called to her when she left. He looked at his watch. Ten minutes to go. He'd better go on ahead and try to find Ashley. 


	5. An Ashley in Distress

Disclaimer: Like always, I don't own this show or its characters or its locations. In this chapter, I only own the clerk and the bully, Cliff.  
  
Chapter Four: An Ashley in Distress  
  
"Hey, Mikey?" asked Vince. They were still all trapped under the dome prison and it was getting hot.  
"Yes, Vince?" Mikey answered.  
"Remember last time we were imprisoned under this thing and you lifted the top and let us all go?"  
"I most certainly do. It was a most memorable moment."  
"Well, do you think you could do it again?"  
"Gosh, I don't know. I guess I could."  
"Of course you can, Mikey," T.J. encouraged. "Because if you want to do something really bad, you can do it."  
Everyone started cheering for Mikey, who was looking very inspired to be a hero.  
"Okay, I'll do it."  
But just as Mikey was about to lift the prison and free the kids, here came Cap'n Sticky and some of his friends.  
"You no try to escape, big kids!" he yelled and with much effort, lifted the hockey stick sceptor and hit Mikey upside the head, knocking him out. The kids gasped.  
"You barbarians!" Ashley Q. screeched.  
"That was our only hope of escaping! What are we gonna do?!" Gus panicked.  
"I don't know, Gus," T.J. said half-heartedly. "I just don't know."  
  
"So what exactly is the plan?" asked Spinelli to Hustler Kid.  
"Well, first we have to sneak past the Kindergartners," he began. "Then we have to find someway to break the others out."  
"Oh, is that all?" Spinelli said sarcastically. "Gee, I wonder how we're gonna do that?"  
"I figured that we could somehow distract the Kindergartners and then hoist up the 'prison', and let everyone out."  
"Distract them? You mean like live bait or something?"  
"Oh, heavens, no!" Hustler Kid proclaimed. "I mean...I don't know. Like, break into Finster's office and toss all the confiscated candy out the window or something."  
Spinelli's eyes lit up.  
"Hey, not a bad idea! Then what?"  
"I haven't figured that part out yet. But I do have an idea to get into the building," Hustler Kid said mysteriously.  
"Oh, really? And that would be...?"  
Hustler Kid took out one of those hook things that you throw on the top of a building to pull yourself up with (like Kim Possible uses).  
"I was thinking to pull ourselves to the top, enter the school through the air vent up there, and find our way around that way," he explained.  
"That sounds so cool! What are we waiting for? Let's go do some damage!"  
  
While Bob was handling the unexpected run-in with his mother and sister, Ashley had gotten on the escalator and went up to the second floor. Looking behind her, she could see Miss Finster having problems getting away from the little Girl Scouts.  
"Get away from me!" she would yell. "I don't want any of your crummy cookies! No, I am not a grouchy old lady!"  
Ashley finally reached the second floor and looked for a place to hang out at for the time being. She still had about twenty minutes to kill so she headed for the store "Southern Belle".  
"Ahh, a nice place to spend some of Daddy's money," she thought happily as she examined anything that was expensive.  
She had finally made the decision that she liked the fuschia dress more than the baby blue and figured she didn't need to try it on, so she headed for the checkout.  
"Yes, could you, like, tell me how much this dress is?" she asked a French- looking woman  
The lady looked over the dress.  
"Oh, this is a very popular dress for the little girls, no? You're in luck, little madamoiselle, it's on sale for a thousand dollars. Would you like to buy it?"  
Ashley's mouth dropped open. One thousand dollars? She may have preferred expensive clothes but one thousand dollars was really high. Besides, she only had eight hundred dollars left on her credit card.  
"Like, as if! It's not worth it," she said a little rudely and left the store.  
Having nothing else to do, Ashley sat down on an empty bench near the water fountain (yes, a water fountain on the second floor, believe it or not). She could see Miss Finster busy scurrying through the ground floor departments trying to find her and Bob. Ashley looked at her watch and saw she had about ten minutes left.  
"Might as well go now while Finster's occupied," she thought and rose from the bench.  
She had only gone a few steps when she felt someone tap her shoulder. Not liking to be bothered by complete strangers, she turned around ready to chew the person out but stopped when she came face to face with a tall, big boy who looked like he was the member of a gang.  
"Hey, don't I know you?" the boy asked.  
"Like, I don't think so," Ashley replied. She was starting to get freaked out by this guy.  
"Aren't you that rich dude's kid, what's his name? Oh, yeah, Armbrewster! You're that little brat kid of his, right?"  
"I'm not a brat! And how do you, like, know my dad?" Ashley demanded.  
"Know him? Are you kidding? He's the one that tore down our skateboarding park and put up this stupid mall in the first place!" the boy informed nastily.  
"He did? Well, I'm sorry but I can't help you there. What's done is done. Now, if you'll excuse me..."  
The boy pulled her back towards him by her backpack and yanked it off her.  
"Hey, give me that, you creep!" Ashley yelled while trying to grab her pack from his hands. He held it over her head tauntingly.  
"That's Cliff the creep to you, princess," the boy (Cliff) sneered. "What are you going to do if I don't give it back? Tell your daddy?"  
"NO!" she yelled.  
"Bet you will!" replied Cliff. "Cause you're a Daddy's girl!" He started chanting the last two words and danced around her laughing the whole time.  
  
Bob in the meantime managed to get to the second floor after searching the first one for Ashley, and when he got up there he saw trouble in the making. Ashley was trying desperately to get her stolen backpack from a gangster-looking bully, who was busy calling her names and teasing her.  
"Daddy's girl! Daddy's girl! Daddy's girl!" he taunted. "Daddy's little girl! Ha ha ha!"  
"Leave me alone and give me my backpack!!" Ashley screamed almost on the verge of tears.  
Bob suddenly got very angry at what this boy was doing and stormed over there.  
"Oooh, you want me to leave you alone, huh? That's funny. Real funny, daddy's girl."  
Bob walked up behind the bully (Ashley hadn't noticed him yet) and spoke up.  
"Give that back to her, you jerk!"  
Cliff turned around swiftly, surprised at the order. When he saw Bob standing there with a very aggravated look on his face, he began to laugh.  
"Oh, man! This is crazy! Ha ha! Dude, you are really short! What happened, miss your growth spurt?"  
Bob knew he wasn't as tall as most other boys his age (which is why he wore the really big shoes at school), but he didn't like it when people told it to his face.  
"Listen, buddy. You leave her alone or I'll..."  
"Or you'll what?" Cliff interrupted. "Hit me? Not hardly, shorty! I bet you hit like a girl, like your wimpy little girlfriend!" Cliff started laughing obnoxiously, and Bob was getting madder by the second.  
"Oh, yeah?" Bob challenged. Cliff stopped laughing as Bob reared back and punched him hard in the nose, and he fell backwards into the water fountain. Cliff wiped his nose and saw blood, screamed, and started crying like a big baby.  
"Who's laughing now?" Bob said proudly.  
Ashley was stunned that Bob had actually punched someone, but even more so that he had done it to protect her.  
"Wow, Bob," she said admiringly. "You, like, saved me."  
Bob was actually kind of shocked himself that he had hit a guy and was feeling a little shaky.  
"Uh, no I didn't," he denied. "I was just doing what I was supposed to do."  
"Which is...?"  
"Uh, protecting damsels in distress?" he guessed.  
"Yeah, right."  
Suddenly, Miss Finster showed up.  
"There you are you little hooligans!"  
Bob and Ashley looked at her startled.  
"I've got you now, Robert Mitchells and Miss Armbrewster! Wait 'till your parents hear about this!"  
"RUN!!" Bob and Ashley yelled at the same time and took off running down the escalator.  
"Oh no, here we go again..." Finster muttered as she took off after them.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Awww...how sweet! King Bob saved Ashley and he even tried to deny it. How very noble indeed...don't forget to leave a review!! 


	6. Plans of Action

Disclaimer: Like always, I don't own this show or its characters or its locations. I just own King Bob's mother and a few original characters.  
  
Chapter Five: Plans of Action  
  
Bob and Ashley ran down the escalator with Finster hot on their trail. Busting through the large crowds of people, they finally made it to the front door. They jumped into Prickley's car and could see Miss Finster running towards them.  
"Like, hurry up and start the car!" Ashley yelled.  
"I'm trying to find the key!" Bob answered, digging through his pockets.  
"I've got you now, you fiends!" Miss Finster heaved.  
"Got it!" Bob said triumphantly and started the engine.  
The car wheeled out of the parking lot and Miss Finster was left behind screaming and pitching a fit. Bob and Ashley made it onto the highway and sped right into a traffic jam.  
"Oh perfect!" Ashley complained. "Miss Finster is sure to catch us now."  
"Will you be quiet?" Bob asked a little roughly. "I am trying to think."  
"Well, excuse me," Ashley responded sarcastically.  
In the rear view mirror, Bob could see Miss Finster's hot pink car pull into traffic about ten cars behind him. Miss Finster got out of the car and started towards them.  
"Oh my gosh! She's,like, coming over here!" Ashley panicked.  
"Hang on. I've got a plan," Bob said. He climbed over the door and landed on the street, and then walked over to Ashley's side.  
"Come on!" he told her.  
"Are you nuts! I'm not getting out of this car!"  
"Just do it!" Bob demanded angrily.  
Ashley rolled her eyes and got out. When she did, Bob grabbed her hand and headed to this young couple looking for a taxi.  
"Excuse me, but would you like this car?" Bob asked them.  
"I beg your pardon?" the man asked curiously.  
"I said, would you like to have this car for a while? For free? No catch?"  
"Is this some kind of joke, kid?" the woman asked.  
"Uh..." Bob looked over at the street and saw Miss Finster arguing with some drivers. He turned back to the couple.  
"Okay, here's the thing. We need someone to watch our car for a little while, say fifteen minutes. You guys drive around in it or whatever and then meet us back here. I'll pay you twenty bucks..." He got a twenty out of his wallet and waved it in front of their faces to tempt them. They fell for it.  
"Okay, twenty bucks sounds good. But, why are we doing this?" the man asked.  
"Me and my, uh, sister have a little problem so we just need a break and get ourselves situated," Bob told them. Man, he was sure getting tired of lying to everyone!  
"I suppose we could take care of the car for a while," the lady told her husband.  
"All right, we'll help," the husband agreed.  
"Great! Here's the twenty. Remember, be back here in about fifteen to twenty minutes," Bob reminded.  
"Sure, kid."  
Bob and Ashley hid inside the nearby diner and watched out the window.  
"Your sister?" Ashley glared.  
"Well, what was I supposed to say? We're a little young to be calling ourselves a couple don't you think?"  
"BOB!"  
The couple got inside the car and started talking to each other. Bob and Ashley couldn't hear what they were saying but here's what they said anyway:  
"Honey, can you believe those kids?" the woman asked.  
"Heck, no! I mean twenty bucks for a twenty minute joyride? It's like getting paid to have fun!"  
"Let's see how fast this little baby can go," the woman said mischieviously.  
"Yeah, let's see how many miles we can put on it."  
They tore out of the traffic line onto a side road. Miss Finster saw them and began yelling again, got into her car, and chased after them.  
Bob was trying very hard not to bust out laughing and literally had tears running down his face. Ashley, however, just watched the whole scene in frustration.  
"I cannot believe you just, like, lied to those people," she said.  
"Oh, come on! I didn't lie for real. I just didn't tell them about Finster and that we we're really breaking the rules."  
"It's still lying."  
"Yeah, yeah. Whatever."  
"Oh, my gosh!" Ashley exclaimed suddenly.  
"What!" Bob sat up quickly, thinking something was wrong. "What happened? What's wrong?"  
"I totally left my backpack at the mall!"  
"WHAT! After all that?"  
"Uh, yeah." Bob couldn't believe it. Ashley felt a little bad about it.  
"Umm, I never actually thanked you for, you know, punching that guy," she said after a while. "It was very, uh, virtuous of you." Virtuous. She decided she liked that word.  
Bob started turning red. He'd never really been thanked by anyone except maybe his mother at times.  
"Uhh...your welcome, Ashley."  
Ashley began getting a little uncomfortable, talking to a boy, even if it was just King Bob. But she never really thought of him as a normal kid until today, and, well...she never actually started thinking about how cute he was either...  
  
Spinelli and Hustler Kid had managed to sneak around to the shaded side of the school building. The Kindergartners were busy having a huge party in honor of their victory. They did, however, keep a close watch on their prisoners.  
"Now what do we do?" Spinelli asked.  
Hustler Kid threw the hook-thingy and it gripped the top part of the building. He tugged it to make sure it would hold then whispered,  
"Okay, hang on tight, 'cause we're gonna go up," he instructed.  
Spinelli wrapped her arms around Hustler Kid's shoulders and hung on as they started climbing the side of the building. Good thing the Kindergartners were throwing that party or they would have been caught for sure. They finally got to the top and Spinelli let go of Hustler Kid, who was busy wrapping the rope back up.  
"All right. Now where's that air vent you were talking about?" Spinelli asked while looking around for it.  
"I don't--"  
"Never mind!" she interrupted. She pulled the top off the vent and looked down. Hustler Kid kneeled beside her and looked too.There was about a five foot drop until the tunnel started going horizontally and connecting to the rooms. Hustler Kid gulped. He wasn't too fond of the idea of having to drop into that tiny space.  
"Well, come on!" Spinelli urged. "Are we goin' in or what?"  
"Uh, ladies first?" Hustler Kid managed to say. He was absolutely scared to death of tight spaces, but he didn't want Spinelli to see that.  
"Fine with me," she said, and carefully dropped down into the shaft. She landed and scooted over to the side. She cupped her hands and carefully said,  
"Okay, your turn."  
Hustler Kid took a deep breath, closed his eyes, and dropped down, landing beside Spinelli. Phew, that wasn't so bad, he thought.  
"Which way do we go?" Spinelli asked.  
"Huh?"  
"Which way to Finster's office?" she repeated impatiently.  
"Oh, uh, that way I think," he said pointing in Spinelli's direction.  
  
"Now we're gettin' somewhere," she said, turning to face the direction Hustler Kid pointed to. "Well, let's get movin'!"  
They started crawling in the shaft and being careful not to make too much noise. Hustler Kid realized maybe it wasn't a good idea to have let Spinelli take the lead. He was staring right at her rear end and it was a VERY embarrassing situation to be in. He tried hard to not look and put his mind on other things.  
"Dang it, Francis, keep your mind on the mission," he told himself. It was a good thing it was dark in there or else Spinelli would have been sure to see how red his face was. He let out a sigh of relief when they finally found an opening.  
"Is this the right one?" Spinelli inquired. Sheesh, she had never asked so many questions before in her life!  
Ready to get out of this crazy position he was in, Hustler Kid told her "maybe" and they both pushed the vent opening off and saw that they were only in Miss Grotke's classroom.  
"Darn, wrong one," Spinelli complained.  
"Uh, that's fine. Miss Finster's office is just a few doors down anyway," Hustler Kid told her.  
"Oh, well why didn't you say so?" Spinelli wondered out loud and got out of the vent.  
Hustler Kid was relieved that he was out of that stupid shaft and started wondering why he had even suggested using it in the first place. He knew very well he was claustrophobic and having Spinelli there with him seemed to make it worse.  
They walked over to the classroom door and opened it. They saw that the hallway seemed deserted.  
"Where is everybody?" Hustler Kid pondered.  
"They're probably all in the Teacher's Lounge, bunch of no good adults," Spinelli guessed. They had only gone a few steps into the hallway when they spotted someone. Tubby had come around the corner suddenly and gasped. He had left Spencer in charge of guarding the trapped teachers for a few minutes while he took a break. The three of them stood frozen looking at each other.  
"Uh-oh," Spinelli muttered.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * 


	7. Ahh, the Sweetness of Confiscated Candy

Disclaimer: Like always, I don't own this show or its characters or its locations. I just own King Bob's mother and a few original characters.  
  
Chapter Six: Ahh, the Sweetness of Confiscated Candy  
  
Tubby let out a huge war cry and sent Spinelli and Hustler Kid running. Spencer came and joined Tubby, and they started chasing after them.  
"I thought all the Kindergartners were outside!" Hustler Kid exclaimed while running.  
"I guess they left those two in charge of guarding teachers or something," Spinelli answered as they turned the corner.  
They quickly went into an open classroom and hid behind the door. They heard one of the two Kindergartners go by.  
"I wonder where the other one went," Hustler Kid wondered aloud.  
"Who cares!" Spinelli half-shouted. "Let's just get out of here!"  
  
She grabbed Hustler Kid and practically dragged him out of the classroom, and they headed the opposite way they heard the Kindergartner go. There was no sign of the other one.  
"Okay, coast's clear," Spinelli said.  
Not long after she said that, out pops Spencer from behind a door. He gave a low growl and ran towards them with his hands outstretched.  
Acting fast, Hustler Kid spotted a nearby rolling book rack that a teacher had carelessly abandoned and pushed it towards the pint-size terror. It hit Spencer in the face and sent him flying into a trash barrel.  
"Come on!" Hustler Kid shouted grabbing Spinelli's hand. "Miss Finster's office is right over--"  
He didn't get a chance to finish because suddenly Tubby appeared and threw himself so high, that he landed on top of Hustler Kid's head and started kicking and biting and beating his head.  
"OW! OW, OW, OW!" the terrified boy yelled. Spinelli grabbed Tubby and ripped him off Hustler Kid's head. Holding him by one leg, she asked him,  
"All right, you little menace! What in the world's goin' on around here? Why are you guys taking over our playground? What have you done with the teachers?"  
"We take over Big Kid Land because we tired of being locked up in ours and being told what to do all the time. Teachers are locked in lounge. Me and Spencer guard. Then you show up and we attack!" Tubby began fighting and squirming to get out of Spinelli's grip. Spinelli turned him right side up.  
"Listen, you little punk, I for one and getting tired of all this. Now, you and your little friend Spencer better get out of here before I get REALLY mad!"  
  
"Hey, where Spencer?" Tubby asked.  
"He's...uh...in the trash can, kid," Hustler Kid told him, pointing toward the blue barrel at the end of the hallway. Tubby looked at Spinelli's threatening glare and ran to get Spencer out of the garbage.  
"Well, now that that's over, let's go get some confiscated candy!" said Spinelli.  
They both headed towards Finster's office and carefully opened the door. They were a little surprised that she wasn't in there.  
"Now, if I were Finster, where would I hide candy?" Spinelli thought aloud. They looked everywhere in the office for it, but didn't have any luck.  
Hustler Kid was looking around on the bookcase and saw the Roald Dahl book "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory". Kind of curious as to why a lady like Muriel P. Finster would have a children's book in her office, he grasped it and pulled it out. When he did, the whole bookcase moved and revealed a secret passageway, nearly frightening both kids to death.  
"Wow, cool!" Spinelli shouted after getting over the shock of seeing a wall move. "A secret room!"  
  
She ran inside and found a light switch. Both were surprised at what they found.  
"It's...it's a whole room of candy!" Spinelli gasped in wonder.  
"This must be where she hides it all. There's no telling how old half of it is," Hustler Kid said. He was also thinking of how much all this candy would be worth if sold.  
"Well, let's grab a few armfuls and throw it out the window!" Spinelli suggested, interrupted Hustler Kid's thoughts of riches. Spinelli started tossing as much candy as she could at Hustler Kid, who was soon struggling to lift up about thirty pounds of sugary sweets. Spinelli ran to Finster's window that overlooked the playground and lifted it. Hustler Kid staggered over to her, feeling that his back would surely break any minute.  
"Kindergartners of Third Street!" Spinelli announced. All the Kindergartners, including Captain Sticky, gazed her way. "I give you-- CANDY!"  
Hustler Kid tripped over a fallen jumbo-sized Tootsie Roll and all the candy went flying out the window. The Kindergartners shouted with joy.  
"It's raining candy!" Cindy squealed. They all rushed towards the delicious sweets and began pigging out.  
The kids in the "prison" became aware of what was going on and began cheering Spinelli and Hustler Kid. Mikey began to get conscious again and smelt the scent of chocolate.  
"Oh boy, chocolate!" he exclaimed. He lifted the "prison" and freed the other kids.  
"Get 'em!" T.J. yelled, and all the kids began running towards the Kindergartners, who were still busy stuffing their faces.  
"All right! We did it!" Spinelli shouted happily. In her excitement, she turned around, grabbed Hustler Kid by the lapels of his jacket and kissed him hard on the lips. He was pleasantly shocked, and when Spinelli realized what she was doing, she pushed him out of her way.  
"UGH! What am I doing?" she spat, wiping her lips with her sleeve. She gripped the collar of Hustler Kid's tee-shirt.  
"You tell ANYONE about that kiss, and I'll bust your jaw and gouge your eyes out!!" she threatened. As soon as she said it, she began to wonder if she actually would.  
  
Meanwhile, in town, Miss Finster was still chasing Prickley's car. What she didn't know was that Bob had lented it to a couple, so she was pretty much on a wild goose chase. She saw the car pull into a movie theatre parking lot.  
"Ah-ha! Gotcha this time, you hooligans!" she muttered with glee. She quickly turned into the parking lot and raced over to who she thought was Bob and Ashley.  
"Freeze, you little--" she started, then stopped when she saw who she was speaking to.  
"What the--" the man said angrily. "What is the meaning of this?"  
"I-I'm sorry. I thought you were a couple of kids I'm looking for," Miss Finster apologized.  
"Do we look like kids?" the woman demanded.  
"Uh, no. But this car looks a lot like the one they stole," Finster explained.  
"Stole?" the man asked. "I knew those kids were up to no good when they lent us this car."  
"What? Some kids lent you this car?" Finster asked.  
"Yeah," replied the woman. "They told us to take it for about twenty minutes while they did some planning or something."  
"I knew it! I knew they were troublemakers! Where did you see them at?"  
"At some diner on 78th Street," the man told her.  
Finster ran towards her car and raced back to 78th Street. Those two weren't going to trick her again! 


	8. Busted!

Disclaimer: Like always, I don't own this show or its characters or its locations. I just own King Bob's mother and a few original characters.  
  
Chapter Seven: Busted!  
  
While Finster was chasing down Prickley's car, Bob and Ashley were still in the diner sitting at a booth. Ashley was busy eating her hot- fudge sundae she had ordered. while Bob just stared out the window.  
"All those happy people," he thought as he watched pedestrians walking on the sidewalk. "I bet they don't have stress."  
He saw a little girl walking her dog, which Bob thought looked a lot like his terrier puppy, Scrappy. Sometimes he wondered if Scrappy was the only one that understood him. He knew his parents sure didn't, especially his mom. Ashley noticed that Bob was being unusually quiet.  
"Uh, Bob?" she asked. He glanced over at her.  
"Yeah?"  
"Like, what's wrong? You seem kinda, I don't know...sad."  
"Nothing's wrong," he said gloomily. That was SO a lie, and Ashley knew it.  
"Like, yes there is. Come on, you can tell me," she said.  
"Okay, fine. Just don't tell anyone at school, okay?"  
"I won't," Ashley promised.  
"All right. I know you're probably wondering why I wanted to skip school in the first place, right? Well, part of it was because I was bored out of my mind at school, and plus I just needed a break from all the stress I'm having lately."  
"Stress? Like, what kind of stress?"  
"You know, like at home. See my parents split up two years ago and now they're both dating again. It was fine when Dad started doing it, but when Mom started too...it was just too much to handle. Anyway, they're both so busy with what they want to do, that they never have any time for me."  
Ashley was a little shocked. She didn't know anything about Bob's family life, but she had no idea that his parents were divorced. Her parents were still together, so she had no clue what it was like to deal with parents that were dating other people.  
"Well, don't you like you're parents new, uh, you know..." she asked.  
"Choices in future spouses? Yeah right. My dad's girlfriend, Jamie, is some waitress at a bar, yuck. And then my mom's dating some strict politician guy--you may have heard of him--Jacob Griffin. Man, talk about laying down the law. I've never been corrected so much before in my life!"  
"I may be wrong, but don't you think you need to tell your parents about this?" Ashley suggested.  
"Like they'd listen. They haven't listened to a word I've said since Dad moved out of the house. I can talk to Dad pretty okay sometimes if it's just us two, but Mom is way too busy to deal with me. And my sister, Sheila, isn't any help...mainly because she hates my guts, but she's too busy with college."  
Boy, talk about major issues, Ashley thought. She actually felt sorry for him. She pushed her ice cream bowl out of the way.  
"Listen, don't tell anyone I'm having problems with all this. I really shouldn't have told you, but considering what's all happened today..."  
"Don't worry, Bob. I'm not going to say a word to anyone."  
"Not even the other Ashley's?" Bob asked suspiciously.  
"Nope." Silence crept by slowly.  
"Thanks," Bob finally said with a small grin. Ashley smiled back. Geez, he is SO cute!, she thought.  
Bob glanced at his watch. It was about one-thirty in the afternoon. He had lent the car to that couple almost twenty-five minutes ago.  
"Where the heck are those two people at?" Bob asked rheotorically. "They should have already been back here by now."  
Ashley looked at her own watch and saw that he was right.  
"You don't think they, like, stole it, do you?" she asked a little worriedly.  
"Nah, of course not," Bob said confidently. "They probably just lost track of time."  
Right after he had said that, Ashley saw Miss Finster's car through the diner window. Uh-oh...  
"Uh...Bob? Miss Finster's here!" she said pointing.  
"What?!" Bob exclaimed, turning around to see for himself. "Oh man! We gotta get out of here!"  
They both jumped up and ran out of the diner onto the sidewalk. They could hear Miss Finster yelling at them to stop and come back, but like they were going to.  
"What are we going to do? We don't have a car anymore!" Ashley squealed.  
Bob had no idea what to do, but he had to think of something fast. Then, he saw it.  
"Follow me, I've got an idea," Bob announced, grabbing Ashley's hand and pulling her through the busy sidewalk...straight towards a guy trying to sell his motorcycle. How lucky could they get?  
"Excuse me, sir," Bob said, trying to sound a little older than he looked. The man was very nearsighted (which is why he was selling the bike in the first place), so he couldn't tell how old they were anyway.  
"Yes, young man?" he answered.  
"I was wondering. How much for this fine piece of machinery? It must be quite expensive," Bob continued. The man thought about it for a second.  
"Oh, not much. Just about two thousand dollars," he finally said.  
Bob's eyes nearly came out of their sockets. Two thousand dollars? He couldn't afford that! He felt a tug on his sleeve.  
"Perhaps this will help," Ashley said, waving one of her dad's blank checks.  
"How did you get that? It's signed and everything!" Bob whispered.  
"Daddy always lets me carry around his checks so that I can buy whatever I want," Ashley explained. She turned to the man with the motorcycle. "Two thousand, you say? I'm assuming you take checks?"  
"I take anything that brings me money," the man replied.  
"I thought so. Would you happen to have a pen?" Ashley asked politely.  
The man fished a pen out of his pocket and gave to her. She scribbled something on it and gave it to him. The man examined closely. Bob turned around to see how close Miss Finster was getting. She was getting very close.  
"Okay, I'll cash this first thing in the morning," the man finally told them. "She's all yours."  
"Sweet! I'm driving!" Bob declared and jumped on. Ashley climbed onto the back end.  
"Hey, don't forget your helmets!" the man reminded them, and handed them two helmets. Bob rolled his eyes, but put it on anyway. Ashley wrapped her arms around Bob's waist.  
"Okay, here we go!" Bob shouted, cranking up. If he thought driving a car was hard, driving a motorcycle would be harder. This he realized as soon as he got into traffic and started weaving around the jammed cars.  
"Geez, who ever knew that driving a bike with an engine would be tough?" he muttered.  
Miss Finster saw what had just happened and became very aggravated. She gave up on her car and decided to chase them on foot. Heh, like it would help any...  
Bob was absolutely thrilled. He was starting to get the hang of the whole driving thing. Who knows, he thought. Maybe I won't have to take driver's education in a few years!  
"Hey, where exactly are we going anyway?" Ashley yelled over the engine.  
"Back to school," Bob said matter-of-factly.  
"School?!" Ashley complained. "Why?"  
"Because... school is the last place Finster is going to look for us. I mean, we ARE supposed to skipping you know. And if we're skipping, she wouldn't even think to look for us there."  
  
By this time the playground had turned into one big ugly battlefield. The ruthless Kindergartners were vicious in every way, and many of the older kids had been overpowered. Spinelli and Hustler Kid made it out of the building and ran over to where T.J. was.  
"Hey, guys!" T.J. exclaimed. "Wow, that was some show you two put on. Whose idea was it to distract the little monsters with all that candy?"  
"It was all Francis's idea," Spinelli said, referring to Hustler Kid. "You don't mind if I call you that, do you, buddy?"  
"Um, no," Hustler Kid said blushing. What a girl could do to a guy just by calling him by his real name.  
"I didn't think so. Now let's go kick some Kindergartner booty!"  
  
"Hey, I think we lost her," Ashley said after a while. Miss Finster was absolutely no where to be seen, and they were finally back on Third Street.  
"Thank goodness! I'm bushed." Bob attempted to park the bike straight in an empty parking space, but you know how it is when eleven-year- olds drive.  
They snuck into the main building by the side door. There was not a soul to be found.  
"Wow, where is everyone?" Ashley wondered.  
"I don't know. I haven't been here all day," Bob answered sarcastically.  
"Like, no duh."  
They both heard some pounding coming from the teacher's lounge. Principal Prickley's voice was heard the loudest.  
"Help! Someone get us out of here!"  
Bob gave a deep sigh as if saying "Do I have to do everything around here?", and twisted the door knob and opened the door. All the teachers that had been beating on the door immediately fell down on top of each other in a huge pile.  
"Good grief," Bob said.  
"Hey, do you hear something coming from the playground?" Ashley asked.  
Bob listened carefully. What the...  
"Sounds like a war out there, he noted. They ran down the hall to the door leading out to the playground, opened it, and was very shocked at what they saw.  
"Like, oh my gosh! I totally can't believe it," Ashley gasped.  
"Yeah. World War Three started without me!" Bob whined.  
He jumped down the stairs and after taking a good look at what was going on he yelled at the top of his lungs,  
"QUI-ET!!!"  
Suddenly, everyone was dead quiet. Gus broke the silence.  
"Hey, it's King Bob! He's alive!"  
"YAY!!" the kids shouted happily. The Kindergartners were a little appalled.  
"What on earth is going on here?" Bob demanded.  
"Well, you see, your majesty, while you were gone--" Gretchen started.  
"Silence! That was a rheotorical question," Bob growled.  
He saw Captain Sticky wearing his crown, robe, ring, boots, and carrying the sceptor. Bob stormed over to him.  
"Give me that!" he said, snatching the sceptor out of his hands. "And that, and this, and those," he continued, each time grabbing something from the little dictator's possession.  
"All right, I'm ending this. All you Kindergartners, back to your own playground. All you other Kindergartners, back to your own school. And everyone else, clean up this mess!"  
The playground was indeed a mess. The jungle gym had been littered with candy wrappers, the swings were wrapped around the poles, and the Ashley clubhouse even looked as though it had been ransacked.  
"But King Bob, where were you all day?" T.J. asked.  
"I was...uh...sick with fever all day. And I just got better. Any other questions?"  
"ROBERT ANTHONY MITCHELLS!!!"  
Bob turned quickly at the booming voice. His mouth dropped open in surprise.  
"Mom?" All the other kids on the playground gasped. No one's mother hardly ever showed up at school to yell their child.  
"Robert, I just got a call from a teacher named Muriel Finster. She tells me that you were cutting class and running around the city all day!"  
Bob turned bright red. It was bad enough having his mother yell out his full name in front of his loyal subjects, but to tell them that he was breaking school policy? That was low. He could hear the kids whispering behind him.  
"But Mom..." he started.  
"Don't you 'mom' me, Robert. You are in the biggest trouble of your life. Imagine...skipping school and lying to me about it too! Wait 'till your father hears about this, young man. We are going straight to the principal's office right now!"  
She grabbed him by the ear and started pulling him towards the door. How humiliating...  
"Ow! But, Mom...ow! Ow! Mom, you're hurting me...ow, ow!"  
When they were gone off the playground, no one knew quite what to say. A king had never ever skipped school before. They heard the door open again. Everyone gasped, wondering if it was Miss Finster. Instead, Randall's head poked out. He was back from the dentist. He gazed at all the kids and at all the damage.  
"Whoa, what happened to you guys?" he asked.  
He saw Mikey faint in the background.  
"Okay, sorry I asked." 


	9. Sixth Graders Don't Cry

Disclaimer: Like always, I don't own this show or its characters or its locations. I just own King Bob's mother and a few original characters.  
  
Author's Note: Here it is! The last chapter to this crazy story! *does a victory dance and throws confetti everywhere*. I would like to thank all my reviewers and I hope you all enjoy this last chapter!  
  
Chapter Eight: Sixth Graders Don't Cry  
  
Bob's mother, Allison, was driving down the road in her rental car. Bob sat in the passenger's seat silently. Allison had hardly said a word to him since that trip to the principal's office. He hated it when his mother acted like this.  
"By the way, you're grounded for the rest of the month," Allison finally said after a very long silence.  
"What?!" Bob yelled. "But Dad's coming over this weekend!"  
"You should have thought about that before you lied to me," she snapped. "I've already called him and left a message on his answering machine." Bob went back to looking out the window. More silence...  
"I'm not as upset about your skipping school than I am about you lying to me," Allison added. "I'm very disappointed in you, Robert."  
They finally reached their house at 2107 Birch Avenue and pulled into the driveway. Allison got out of the car. Bob warily did the same thing. Bob's little Jack Russell terrier puppy, Scrappy, heard them pull up and immediately went into frantic barking mode and ran out of his doggy door. Bob picked him up and carried him into the house.  
Sheila was busy doing something on the computer in the living room. When she looked up and saw how angry her mother looked and at Bob's miserable expression, she knew what had happened. When Allison was out of hearing range, she whispered,  
"Get busted, Dorkbert?"  
"Shut up," Bob muttered angrily.  
"Ooh, temper, temper." Silence.  
"Oh, and by the way," Sheila continued. "Did you know that you have no proof whatsoever that I wrecked the car? You should have thought about hiding that picture of it I found in your room in a much safer place."  
Bob sighed deeply. This was defenitely not his day. A few moments later, he heard someone drive up into their driveway. Not long after, someone knocked on the door.  
"Well, just don't sit there, delinquient. Answer the door," Sheila ordered.  
Bob relunctantly got up and opened the door. Oh, great...  
"Hello, Mr. Griffin, sir," he mumbled. If things weren't bad enough, his mom's stupid boyfriend had to come over. Not good.  
"Hello there, Robert," Jacob Griffin replied, giving him a cheesy grin. Bob rolled his eyes and went back to the couch. Allison came into the room.  
"Hey, Jacob," she said, giving him a quick kiss which gave Bob the chills. "You would not believe the day I had."  
"Yeah," Sheila interrupted. "Bob here skipped school and lied about it to Mom."  
"Sheila!" Bob gasped.  
"You what?" Jacob roared. Bob immediately shut up. When Jacob got mad, he got MAD.  
"You skipped school? And lied to your mother? What on earth possessed you to do that?" Jacob barked. Bob gulped.  
"I don't know," he deliberately lied. He wasn't about to tell this lunatic that he did it to have some time to himself since his mother was busy wasting her time with a loser.  
"Come on, son..." Jacob started.  
"I am NOT your son!" Bob growled.  
Just when he thought his mother was about to smack him for back- talking her buffoon of a boyfriend, somebody else pulled into the driveway. This person didn't bother knocking; he just came right into the house.  
"Dad?" Bob asked curiously.  
"Lance?" Allison said at the same time.  
"What is this about you grounding Bobby when you knew full and well that I was going to spend time with him this weekend?" Lance snapped at Allison.  
"Dad, Bob skipped school," Sheila cut in.  
"Sheila, shut up!" Allison said coldly.  
"So. I skipped school all the time when I was his age," Lance confessed.  
"That explains why you're nothing more than an ill-educated handy- man!" Jacob accused.  
"Say that again, you thieving politician!" Lance threatened him.  
"Why I outta..." Jacob was about to punch Lance but Allison grabbed his arm. Scrappy jumped down off Bob's lap and started attacking Jacob's pant leg. Everyone started yelling at each other when suddenly,  
"STOP IT!!"  
Everyone stopped what they were doing and looked at Bob who was now standing up.  
"Will everyone please stop yelling at each other? It's driving me crazy! Just shut up and leave me alone!" With that, Bob walked out the front door and slammed it shut.  
"What's eating him?" Sheila asked.  
  
Bob was plopped down on the porch swing with his arms crossed and his legs dangling. How dare they get onto him when they're the ones acting like a bunch of wild animals!  
He heard the door creak open and shut. Lance showed up and sat down beside him. Bob turned his head the other way.  
"You're not going to lecture me too, are you?" Bob said angrily.  
"No, son. It wouldn't do any good anyway. You're not very good at listening to them," Lance said jokingly. Bob smirked.  
"Well, you're not very good at telling them either."  
Lance chuckled. "No, I guess I'm not. Now, what is this about you skipping school? I'm kind of interested in hearing about it."  
"Well, I'm not interested in telling it right now."  
"O-kay. Then do you mind telling me what made you want to do something like that."  
Bob sighed. How was he going to explain this?  
"Dad, I...," he started. He did NOT want to tell him.  
"Go on," Lance urged gently.  
"It's just that ever since you and Mom got a divorce, you guys don't have time for me anymore. Then, when you both started dating at the same time, I guess I got a little stressed out. I just needed a day off, you know...to clear my head I guess."  
"Good grief, Bobby. If I had known how you felt about us dating again, I would have waited until you thought you were okay with it. Why didn't you just say something?"  
"I didn't think you guys would listen to me," Bob admitted. He was beginning to feel a heavy lump grow in his throat. This was really difficult for him to talk about.  
"No, I guess we wouldn't have," Lance said at last. "We were both still having to build our lives back together. I suppose when I met Jamie, I felt my life coming back to me. Same with your mom with Jacob."  
Bob didn't say anything back so he continued.  
"So, what DO you think of Jamie and you-know-who?"  
"Well, Jacob's always barking out orders like an army general, and the fact that Jamie works in a bar is a little freaky to me."  
"Yeah, I was a little uncomfortable about her working in a bar too, but I learned to accept it. So...about the weekend--"  
"Am I still grounded?" Bob cut in.  
"Sorry, kiddo. You're still grounded. But don't worry, we'll get together sometime before your birthday, okay? That's not far from now, you know."  
"Yeah, I know," Bob muttered, trying hard to keep from crying. Sixth- graders don't cry, he told himself. Especially if that sixth-grader is King of the Playground. Lance reached his arm over and ruffled Bob's hair.  
  
"Well, I gotta go, buddy. I'll call later to check up on you. I'm going to call talk with your mother a while before I leave." Lance got up off the swing and started to go into the house, leaving Bob on the swing alone.  
"Love ya, Dad," Bob told him.  
Lance smiled lovingly at his only son. "I love you too, Bobby."  
  
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Epilogue  
  
Monday at School  
  
It was the first recess of the day. Bob was back on top of the jungle gym being the king again. He was slouched down in his "throne" sucking on a grape-flavored Blow Pop and watching the clouds go by. It was another boring day on the job...  
"Uh, your majesty?" he heard a guard say.  
"Yeah?" Bob answered tiredly.  
"One of the Ashley's is here to see you."  
Bob sat up suddenly.  
"One of the Ashley's? Which one?" he asked.  
"I don't know...the one with the blonde hair," the guard informed.  
"Well, don't just stand there! Tell her to come on up here."  
"Would you like to be left alone?"  
"Yes! Now go!"  
The guard scurried to get Ashley A., while Bob quickly threw his lollipop over the side of the junglegym and sat up a little straighter. He almost croaked when he saw Ashley appear.  
"Hi, Ashley," Bob said a little nervously.  
"Hi, Bob," Ashley said back.  
"Sorry you, like, got in trouble yesterday," she said after a while. "Must have been pretty embarrassing, huh? You know with your mom out there yelling at you in front of everyone."  
"You have no idea. Hey, why didn't you get sent to Prickley's office?" Bob asked. He hadn't even thought about that before.  
"Well, since Daddy's ancestors are, like, the ones that helped fund the school, and the fact that Daddy helps finance it with...stuff...they couldn't do anything to me. Daddy would so cut back their funding and the school would, like, go to pot."  
"Oh."  
"But I still thought it was fun skipping school and everything," Ashley added.  
Bob perked up. "You did? Even when I almost got us killed with my driving, and with that Cliff guy bugging you...you had fun?"  
"Hey, your driving wasn't that bad. And you did give that guy a pretty good hit."  
"Yeah, I guess I did," Bob blushed.  
" Well, at least you didn't get in trouble," Bob told her, changing the subject. "My mom grounded me for the rest of the month and I've got chores to do."  
"Bummer."  
"For real. Did you ever find your backpack at the mall?"  
"Yeah, I sent one of the butlers to go get it for me. It was at the Lost and Found. And before you ask, the motorcycle went to my dad. He's always wanted one and he thinks I was thinking of him when I got it."  
"That's smooth," Bob laughed. "Hey, uh, you know...maybe we should just keep this whole thing to ourselves. Nothing personal of course."  
"Oh no, of course not."  
"Yeah, well...I guess you'd better get back to--"  
Bob didn't finish his sentence because before he could, Ashley had leaned over and kissed him smack on the lips. When she leaned back about three seconds later, Bob didn't quite know what to say.  
"You're a nice boy, Robert Mitchells. Probably the nicest one I know," Ashley admitted.  
Bob was really blushing now. He'd never been kissed before.  
"Don't worry. I'm not going to say anything about that either. Bye now."  
Ashley got up and left him in his throne. Bob could hardly believe what had just happened. He licked his lips. He tasted strawberry lip gloss. His thoughts were interrupted by a couple of his guards.  
"Do you want anything, sire?"  
"Huh? Oh...uh...no. No, I'm fine. You're all excused."  
He watched them all leave, but his mind was on other things. He suddenly felt as if he hadn't a worry in the world. After all, Ashley Armbrewster had kissed him...that was all that mattered.  
  
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Well, that's it for this story! I hope everyone enjoyed the epilogue as much as I did (I think it was my favorite part!)! Don't forget to leave a review!!! 


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